Just in Case, Take Care: Part III

It's a normal Monday night, and I am looking at one of my new shows, Two Broke Girls, and the episode is about Max misinterpreting one of her friends gestures as more than what they are. She ends up kissing him in the streets...while his girlfriend is right behind him. (Click here for full episode). He confronts her and she asks him why didn't he tell her. He said that is was because he didn't know what do with his feelings for her and his girlfriend. Sign? Maybe.

My whole thing is that we've been friends for years, and yes we have even been intimate before. I've started my period and messed up his sheets, he's walked in on me having sex, we just have one of those relationships friendships. Did I think that it was weird that he came into town and didn't meet-up? Yeah, but what can I say. Is it weird that he hung with mutual friends and never bother to call me? I had to hear about it from them. But you couldn't call me? Could he have been hiding some feelings for me and didn't know how he would react when he seen me? Maybe. At the time that he came into town I didn't know that he had a girlfriend. To make matters worst, I seen a picture of him and his girl on his facebook page. Did I feel some type of way? Yeah, I did, but they look good together.

I'm at the point where I think that I need to just stay off of facebook. You see stuff that you don't need to see. I'm a realists and I know that the reason/way that I feel about him and this whole situation is because I was reading into things to much and because of the intimacy that we once had my feelings are distorted. I brought this on myself; he doesn't know how I feel about it and whatever feelings that he may have towards me, he can keep it to himself. To be honest, I think that how I feel about him is just a knee-jerk reaction that I had because I think that him having someone is going to effect what we have. Which isn't much, just open communication. I shared stuff with him that I share with my closest girl-friends. Why couldn't he do the same?

To be a good friend, I am going to keep my word and proof the resume and send it back to him...but after that, like Drake's new album, Take Care.

Afterthoughts: I read everything that I wrote and really sat down and thought about it, and I realize that the posts pertaining to Just in Case, Take Care are my initial reactions. Now that I have had time to think about things--I mean really think about them--I overreacted. Now that the initial shock and raw emotions have passed,  I am fine. Honestly. Writing things out and venting about a situations helps to put things into perspective and see things for what they really are.

Just in Case, Take Care: Part II

Fast forward a couple of conversations and texts, he asks me to proof his resume. Sure. Friends do that for one another. Alright, the next things catches me completely off guard. He states that he would consider moving to PA for a job. Ok, move from a diverse, melting pot, brimming with more opportunity than here, back to PA. (This may actually be the point where I took things a lil' too literally). Oh huh, if that is what you want to do. Now before I get into this next part just know that it's funny how things come out right without you even prying--and just another reason why I feel like social media networks have corrupted our communication skills. So, on a IM conversation, we get into a conversation about sex. He asks me about my celibacy journey and the conversation goes from there. During this conversation he states that he gets in on a regular basis. Really? This is different. I ask

Me:You have a woman?

Him:Yes.

Me:Is it serious?

Him:Yes.

Me:Why didn't you tell me? Change you facebook status? Something that shows that you are seriously talking to someone

Him:You know that I like to keep stuff low-key.

Me:I think that you should have told me.

Mind you, we talk late night, text one another, all the things that if your partner finds they might be like who the bleep is this bleep texting you and you talking to all the time?!?! At this point, my ego is slightly bruised. Its my fault that I read too much into our friendship and that I possibly developed feelings and they didn't surface he told me this and a couple of waves of jealousy ran through me.

The conversation continues and I try to keep it together like I am not phased.

Me: So, what if you get a job up here. You can't just leave her.

Him: I'll bring her with me.

In my mind, I am like ok, this is too weird. I need to cut this short and hit him with the 'take care'. Basically 'take care' means if we talk again, fine, if not, that's fine too.I wish you no ill-will or harm; I wish you the best.

Trying to end on a positive note, I tell him that I will review his resume send it back to him. I try to end the conversation, but we go on a little more about random stuff.

Helater contacted me on IM and ignored him. He sent an email. I ignored him. It's to the point where I stay off of the computer during our normal chat session hours and refrain myself from sending my normal random texts during the work day

To be continued...

Click here to read Part I.

Just in Case, Take Care: Part I

You see it all the time in movies. Two people of the opposite sex who are friends make a pact that if one of them isn't married or in a serious, committed relationship by the time they are 30, then they'll get married. It's called a Just-in: Just in case (fill-in the blank). In real life, people have a just-in, but you may not call it that. I had a just-in...or so I thought.

Perhaps I was living in a dream world, or reading into our frequent conversations way too much. Either way, I feel some type of way. Although we live hundreds of miles away from one another, he came to this area and failed to call me to meet-up. Not even on no nasty type stuff either. I thought that was odd when I heard from other people, and facebook, that he was in the area. When we spoke again, he stated that he was really busy while up here. Whatever. I thought that we were better than that.

To be continued....

Note: Originally this was going to be one long post, venting about an issue that I had with a friend. After careful consideration, I decided to break it up into three parts. I think that once I get to the end of it my feelings may have changed some and it will actually play out in real time. This is not a work of fiction--true life